Friday, July 06, 2007

Still want that brother?

Daniel talks a lot about getting a new brother. He doesn't really understand that we're going through the adoption process, only that some time next year we'll "get" him a brother. In the meantime, I think a lot about how to introduce a child into our family. After all, I'm not having a baby, so we don't have the usuall anticipation time or even ballpark delivery date. Here are some things I've thought of:
We're in the process of cleaning Daniel's room. I'm taking out toys he's done with, setting some aside "for kids who don't have any toys." He found this idea pretty incredible and I realized I had some teaching to do. But he's a generous little bug, so I find I have to keep him from putting HIS favorite toys into the "for others" pile. Fortunately, I've found a lot of his toys have been well-loved, so I don't feel like many of our choices have been wasted. Some things, like his tricycle, I am secretly putting away for his new brother. If he had his way, he'd continue to ride it instead of that wobbly two-wheeler.
I have let him become more involved with his scrapbook. I put it together, but he gets to help pick out the pictures he wants in it, and we read it together afterward. The theory is I can cut down on jealousy as long as he is certain of his place in our hearts.
I read about a first-meeting gift exchange. When we settle on a child and are in the final stages, I'll buy age-appropriate gifts and wrap them. One for Daniel to give his new sibling, one for the boy to give to Daniel. That way they can right away start saying "my brother gave me this!"
Fortunately, my company also allows "maternity" leave in adoption cases. I'm hoping that, when the time comes, I'll take a few weeks off to just be there for both boys. After all, this could be the biggest thing that happens to all of us!


Anonymous said...

are you adopting a baby boy or a toddler? WIll Daniel be the big brother?

misty said...

We're thinking of a toddler. All the research I've seen says it's good if your natural child is the oldest.

ChrissyCherie said...

That is awesome Misty! Congrats on the newest addition in the coming months!