Monday, June 25, 2007


I found a new Web site I'm liking a lot - For moms on the edge. Found this under the "columns" section.

"In this week's personal essay, "Dr. Mom: the truth about the 'mommy track'," Tara Bishop, M.D., eloquently discusses her decision to stay at home with her children in spite of degrees from M.I.T. and Cornell. Tara is the worst nightmare of suddenly-everywhere writers like Leslie Bennetts, whose new book, The Feminine Mistake, criticizes educated women for opting out of the workplace. Of course, the choice not as simple as pundits like Bennetts make it sound. Dr. Bishop writes in her Babble essay:

We are the generation that took pride in the fact that we could break the glass ceiling or devote our lives to our children; society would accept anything. But it won't. It's very difficult to work overnights when you're breastfeeding. There's always pressure to work more. So we have to give up something. And if you're an educated woman, that usually means neglecting your kids or your career, and feeling guilty either way.

The reader feedback on that piece indicates that one of the hardest things we're all doing is figuring out how to balance work and home. We can't be with our kids full-time and doing whatever else we love full-time, too. So how much of either do we sacrifice? According to this week's Babble poll, as of this writing, 81% of us are working and relying on some combination of stay-at-home spouse (9%), at-home or part-time schedule (22%) and professional help (50%).

So, why are 19% of us staying home with the kids? And why do the rest of us sometimes envy them? Babble sent Helaine Olen to interview Pamela Stone, the author of Opting Out? Why Women Really Quit Careers and Head Home. Stone is one of the few authors asking women why they made the choices they have rather than attacking them We can't be with our kids full-time and doing whatever else we love full-time, too. So how much of either do we sacrifice?for either working too much or too little. Her conclusion: the lack of flexible work options is making it impossible, or at least extremely difficult, for women to have it all. Stone told Babble:

Bankers used to have what were called banker's hours, because they were good hours. Well, a banker's hours are horrible hours now. All these professions are going into a speed-up at the same time that you have more women with family responsibilities. So there is this head-on collision of these two trends."


1 comment:

Angela said...

Either way you look at it, having children is a sacrifice. You either have to give up time with the kids or you give up your job. I think, from my experience, it depends on your personality, as well. Some people were just not meant to stay at home and be housewives and stay-at-home moms. I've felt guilty about that from time to time, but my son is turning out fine. I love my job and my work and he knows all the time I spend there means that we have a roof over our heads. I think I read somewhere that its QUALITY of time not QUANTITY.